wonderful days

I've felt nothing but happiness for the past 4 days. No doubts about how you feel. You are wonderful to me and take every chance to tell me that you think I am wonderful too. I don't know when or if I'll ever see you in person again, but for now, I'm just happy that you are in my life in any way. I appreciate every call, every message, every time I get to see you through video. I even got to talk to your parents today, and they like me. That just makes my day, maybe my week! Everything about you just gets better and better. I told you that you're practically perfect. What I mean is, you are perfect for me, in my eyes, a perfect match, a perfect balance. Now if only we didn't have these obstacles between us, we might be perfect together.

I realized something too today. You've kind of fixed me. I've never thought someone could fix someone else. You have to fix yourself, right? My thoughts of self harm, self hate... I haven't thought about those things in a couple months. I've lived with those evil impulses in my head for 30 years. How did you do that? Seems like it had to be you. You came in to my life, and now I feel better about myself. Even through the turmoil I've felt in these past months, I haven't turned to thinking about hurting myself. I don't know if you are aware of the bad things that were in my head, but they seem to be gone now. That is so huge, I don't even know how to describe it.

Somehow you quietly rescued me. I love you. Thank you.